Back in 2016, when Joe retired at the age of 62 tears old, I did a Blog Series titled "Planning for Early Retirement".....
Click on that title and then click on each title and picture for each post in the Series to read them.....
The 5th post in the Series is titled "Mentally Adjusting to Early Retirement".......
In this post, I featured articles on the subject and spoke about how Joe, who was retired by then, was adjusting mentally to having all that time on his hands.....
This is from an article that I featured in that post and how it applied to Joe at THAT time.....
"This is a great article on adjusting your "Life Style to Retirement"
Some of the points it touches on are listed below.......
1. Missing out on the daily social interaction with many different people
I think this bothers Joe the most because I always said he is Mr. Social Butterfly!!
2. Getting Used to new routines
3. Finding purpose and meaning to your days
4. Realize that you don't have to be anywhere:
Joe definitely needs to adjust since he is usually moving at the Speed of Light.
I call him the Energizer Bunny, the Tazmanian Devil, a Whirling Dervish!! You get it ,don't you?
He has to learn to slow down and pace himself as he has a lot more time than he used to.
Another thing he is trying to do is stay up later so that he will not be up at 5 am every morning!!
5. Stay active and exercise:
Joe is used to walking for 6 hours a day, delivering mail.
So he is now walking in the morning around the shopping center that is located right next to us or through our development which hs a lot of hills and when it gets too cold or the weather is inclement, he plans on walking inside the mall that is located 5 minutes from our house which opens at 8 am for walkers.
I wish I could join him but with my knee, I can not walk for any distance until I have my Knee replacement surgery.
6. Socialize and spend time with Family and Friends
We are actually having a lot more family dinners with the kids than we did before when both of us were working
7. Adopt a dog
This is something that we are reconsidering again but will not seriously think about it until the Spring...
8. Find a hobby or pursue one you already have
9. Volunteer
Joe will probably start to volunteer to work some fund raisers for our church in the future
Click HERE to read this article....."
OKAY,
So now it is 3 years later and we will take a look at how Joe is doing.....
Joe now works part time at Wegman's......
He does no more than 20 hours a week , with no evenings, no weekends.
Doing this has helped him adjust to pretty much all of the points listed in that article:
1. Missing out on the daily social interaction with many different people
Since Joe now works in The Cafe or in the Alcohol area, he has time to chat with people and since he is required to ask for the ID of every single person who buys alcohol, he sees where they are from and then starts up a conversation with them...
2. Getting used to New Routines
Joe no longer needs to get up at 5 am to go to work and has gotten quite used to "sleeping in". He now gets up between 6:30 am to 7:30 am. He listed his hours of availability at Wegman's starting at 8:30 am and ending at 4:00 pm. He seldom starts work before 9 am and Wegman's is very good honoring those hours.
3. Finding Purpose and Meaning to your Days
Even though Joe had always planned on working part time in retirement, he took his first year post retirement off before starting to do so. He was then bored out of his ever loving mind and knew he needed to do something about it. Joe does not have any hobbies and is not one to "look" for something to do
4. Realize you do not have to be anywhere
This was hard for him because since he did not have to be anywhere he was constantly running out to the stores which we live right by to "get something" . Joe is bored being at home. That is something that we definitely do not share.
5. Stay active and exercise
Working part time keeps him active and he leaves for work about a half hour ahead of time and walks around the store. He also will leave an hour ahead of time for Hockey games and will walk the concourse of the arena. I hope that once I am fully recovered from my knee replacement surgery , I will be able to start to walk for exercise and he will join me.
6. Socialize and spend time with family and friends
Working allows Joe to socialize with people we know and to meet new people
7. Adopt a Dog
This is something that we have been thinking about and have decided we will table this decision until next Spring
8. Find a hobby or pursue one you already have
Joe's one hobby is hockey and is lost in the Summers when hockey is on a hiatus. But during Hockey season, he watches it on TV and since we are Season ticket holders to the Wilkes Barre Scranton Penguins , he attends pretty much every home game.
9. Volunteer
Well, this is something that has not happened due to the fact that we might be changing churches and is something that I can not speak about at this time because it is very upsetting to me
Okay, so Joe has adjusted to early Retirement and thoroughly enjoys working part time at Wegman's and is eager to do and learn new things there like the training that he received for certification with the Pa. Liquor Control Board which enabled him to become a certified seller of alcohol in the Commonwealth.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ME ......
NOW that I have officially retired.......
I also planned on retiring early at the age of 62 years old after I had had my knee replacement surgery that I put off for 6 years!!
My plan was to have the surgery done at the end of October this year, stay on medical leave until the end of Jan., when I turn 62 and then go on Social Security and start collecting a life long monthly payment of $1000 from an annuity that I set up with some money from my 401K.
There is a saying,
"Make Plans and God Laughs"
Yes, I have planned for a long time to retire early but I did not plan for how suddenly it happened.....
My last day of work was Feb. 21 when I had an appt. with my Ortho Surgeon because I could hardly walk and that was the end of me working!!
Here is an excerpt from an article that I recently read:
" After Retirement, Anxiety and Depression...
You retire and suddenly:
- You've lost your identity... who are you?
- You have all this free time, time with no commitments, something you waited for all your working life... but you are not happy.
- Your head is running in circles, anxiety run amuck, never ending questions with no answers.
Retirement is a life-changing transition period and HOW you choose to live your retired lifestyle IS a choice. Right?
Oddly enough, all our working years, we wish for freedom.
We can't wait to be wild, happy and free in retirement.
Everyone has been asking: "When are you going to retire?" and adding... "Man, I wish I could." Yeah, sure... sounds so good at 30, 40, even maybe 50, but when you are at retirement age, this question (and the answer) is completely different.
But, in your own time, you make the decision and choose to retire.
Then comes the day we walk out the proverbial retirement door, wild and free for the first time since grade school, right?
Woo hoo!
We are excited.
Heck, we are FREE from the everyday drudge of working life!
We can do what we want to do -- all day, every day!
Who Am I?-- and -- What Do I DO with the Rest of My Life?
During the working years, the ability to keep up our household duties (meals, grocery shopping, housekeeping, yardwork, etc) is not easy and usually squeezed into the weekends. Free time sounds positively blissful. BUT that is often not the case post-retirement.
This FREEDOM is just one more issue with your retirement transition, suddenly, nothing is the same.
Even Bill Gates Deals with "Who Am I Now?"
You are transitioning to a new retired person, so did Bill...
- You've left your friends behind as they are still working, but were they really friends or simply co-workers? Put the relationships in the correct perspective and if they were great friends -- grab that phone and make a lunch date with them -- now!
- You've lost your identify and ask yourself: who AM I now? It feels odd to introduce yourself -- "Hi, I'm Wendy" instead of "Hi, I'm Wendy from Human Resources" or "Bill, CEO of Microsoft".
Click HERE to read the entire article
The first 2 months that I was off from work was hard because of the pain that I was in.
I did spend a lot of time watching TV and on the internet but I did manage to get the house cleaned and ready for when I came home after my surgery and for my period of recovery....
After the surgery, again, I was dealing with pain and focusing on my exercises, going to Physical Therapy twice a week and on just trying to regain my strength.
Then came the phase where I finally started to feel like myself and to feel "well" again......
But I had fallen into what my Mother would call " A Lazy Lifestyle"
I seemed to float through out my days with no specific plans in mind and no purpose.....
Even though there are plenty of things that I wanted to do at home....
I started to feel depressed, useless, lacking a sense of direction.....
I could not understand why I was feeling this way because after all, hadn't I wanted to "be Home" for the past 40 years???????
Why wasn't I happy about it??????
I have NEVER defined myself solely as just being a Nurse.......
My Mother forced me into it because my sister was a nurse and because she thought it was a "respectable" profession!
I have defined myself as a Crafter, an Entrepreneur, a Decorator, an Author, a Blogger, a Fund Raising Expert, a Victorian Soul, the major Bread Winner, a Nurse and a Mother.....
Even though my profession was Nursing, it was only a small part of my life.....
So why did I feel like I did lose part of my Identity???????
I was used to having a schedule for doing just about everything and I only had a certain period of time to get those things done.....
My Neighbor, Elly, always used to say " Give a job to a busy person and they will get it done"
I now understand the full extent of what that means......
Busy people have to be organized and I was always considered to be a very organized person......
After all, I worked full time all those years and NEVER missed anything that my sons were involved in whether it was attending parties and parades at school, being a Den Mother in Cub Scouts and chaperoning school activities....
That was the nice thing about working full time night shift, I just didn't sleep but attended everything that my sons had going on.....
Almost 10 years ago, I started to Blog and now I have 2 blogs including my Christmas Blog, A Debbie-Dabble Christmas
For over a decade, I ran our church Flea Market where we collected items year round and I would work in the Flea Market garage once a week, pricing, discarding and re-boxing items....
I became a Crafter who participated in local Craft Fairs.......
I was always a Hostess for our church's Harvest Tea and at times I had 3 tables to decorate and provide food for.....
I also ran a Victorian Tea for our church one year....
And NOW I am officially "Retired" having resigned on August 19th!!!
I have all the time in the world, with nothing that I really "have to" do and no particular place to be....
Meaning, I do not have to be on a Schedule and make my To Do Lists.....
I do have a lot of things that I want to do around the house, crafts that I want to do and places where I would like to go but I have found that since I am on no particular schedule, I tend to become "lazy" and put it off until tomorrow because I now HAVE tomorrow to do things!!!
However, I recently learned the hard way with the passing of my nephew that Tomorrow is not guaranteed to any of us......
So where do I go from here?????
How do I manage my Time so that I feel productive and useful and organized?????
What is my Identity now?????
NO, I do not plan on working part time like Joe!!
I have worked and earned my own money since I was 12 years old, baby sitting for 4 different families, so I am DONE working after 49 years!!!
I will explore all these points that I mentioned and share a Time Management Plan that I have been working on in a future Blog post on this subject......
If you are retired or do not work, please feel free to share as a comment how you manage your time.....
I look forward to reading your comments and maybe learning a few things for you.....
And I hope you will stop by to visit again soon!!
Thanks to those who took the time out of their busy day to spend a little bit of time with me!!
If you do not have a blog, PLEASE give me some way to reply to your comment, maybe by including your email in your comment. If I can not find a way to reach you, I will reply on the post where you commented so please check back......
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Great points and I love that Joe decided he needed some structure in his day like a part time job! I love the idea of adopting a dog next spring! Congratulations! My mom is a retired nurse. laura
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for stopping by and for your kind comment!! I am not sure how to get in touch with you so I am responding here..
DeleteHugs,
Debbie
Interesting to think that we could possibly get bored with being home after wanting it for so long. I think that you both are doing what you need to. There is nothing wrong with being a little lazy at times. I personally, would love to retire and travel, but I am not sure it will happen so I am retiring now!
ReplyDeleteI'm a introvert so I don't miss working at all. Because of the economy and the nature of my line of work, (I was a live-out Nanny) I stopped working in Dec. 2013 and just never found a good nanny job like the one I had in the Silicon Valley. I do miss the little ones. No grandkids YET for me. I've adjusted well. The BIG change, comes after Dec. 6 of this year, when my husband retires. He sounds like your husband. Always on the go. He has it in his mind, that he will build things - work with his hands. Fix up our home, the way we want it for our old age. WE have a dog and a cat we dote on. He might take a year off and then get some menial job that he can leave behind at work.
ReplyDeleteI am so ready mentally, for this stage in our life. I believe my husband is too, but we'll just have to wait and see.
I have similar interests as you. Crafting and home decorating and gardening etc. So happy I found your blog.
Wow! You put so much time and thought into this post...and lots of time and thought into retirement. All of this is SO VERY meaningful to me. I retired from teaching (early childhood ed.) in 2005 but then continued to work part time for two different universities for the next 9 years...making my own schedule and visiting many different schools to supervise student teachers. I loved it! I finally retired altogether 3 yrs. ago and I have to admit I really miss working. Retirement has been a H-U-G-E adjustment for me. Like what you said, I miss the people I worked with and just being among people; I especially miss the children. It's hard to just stop working after 40 1/2 years! I do have two grandchildren (16, 13) that live close by and a lot of my time over the years has been keeping them after school, providing taxi service, etc. (which I've loved). But now that they are older they don't need me as much and are busy doing their own things. So that has been another big adjustment for me this past few months. Also, 2 of my closest friends have moved away and my best friend now has dementia, so I often feel lonely. So many of my friends were connected with work! My husband has now been retired for a little over a year and works part-time 3 days a week. He would go crazy without some work to do...and he would drive me crazy being underfoot all the time....shhhh...don't tell him I said that:) Although there are some things I sort of like to do (write, paper crafts, a little gardening), I am having a hard time being motivated to do any of that. Sometimes I really wish I hadn't retired. It's nice to sleep late but retirement can be a lonely concept to adjust to. I try to stay busy, I go to the gym, I co-teach Sun. Sch., still help with 13 yr. old g'daughter, etc. At least I'm not just sitting around getting addicted to soap operas and eating bon-bons all day!!!!! Anyway...sorry this is long. I enjoyed your post and it gives me lots of food for thought.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing this article it is so true. I remember the first year my father retired (he was 55 years old) he was ill and depressed. Then he went back to work part-time and volunteered and he found purpose and was blissful! It was all he could talk about --- retiring early but it was a disaster without a plan.
ReplyDeleteI know you are going to enjoy your creative actives as soon as your knee is better than ever.
Happy Fall,
Kippi
What a thoughtful post. I retired early and the first thing I did was a road trip asking people I knew who had retired their best tips. I never had an adjustment, I was so ready, even though I retired for medical reasons, I was always busy and had things to do. I was worried about losing my work identity but that was also my public face and in time people begin to forget you in that role. Another TV retiree and I have shared about how we can now sometimes go out without make up or in bad hair and not worry about it like we did right after! Retirement is so relaxing mentally. Not that you become mentally inactive but the stress is gone. At least, as long as the income is still there!
ReplyDeleteAll the best to you in your retirement now that it is official. I’m certain you’ll find lots to do with crafting and decorating.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear that you may be changing churches. After our former parish, which we were quite active in, merged with another in our town, we had to make the difficult decision to leave for another. It was the right decision. We are not really active in our new parish, though I am a reader at Saturday night mass once a month, and the anonymity is a good change for us. It was difficult to leave and start new, but the new pastor at the time was a total jack hole to me and I won’t put up with that. Prayers for you. Glad to see you’re feeling better with your knee. I’m looking forward to when I can get mine replaced and feel better too.
Everyone I know that has retired has had to make quite the adjustment. We made the decision when our daughter was young that I would be a stay at home mom. After our daughter was off to college that was the adjustment that I had to take because my life revolved around her. I had to find my own identity and not the mom I had always been. Being in the Air Force, my hubby's hours were always changing but there was and still is stability because I am home. As I have gotten older I make lists now of what I want to accomplish the next day the night before and try to get them all done, just like a job but I can do it at my leisure and pick when I want to do what :) I volunteer at our church, go to bible studies that is my socializing. I also joined a few online card making groups that I have made friend through and we talk about life in general, pretty small tight knit group. We use to have a dog and two cats but they all passed away, we waited two years and now we have a kitten, forgot how much work they are but I just love having a little companion again, I know it isn't for everyone but I enjoy taking care of him.
ReplyDeleteMy father's first couple years after retirement were filled with relocating, customizing new home, landscaping a large undeveloped lot. Then he bought a boat and enjoyed time on the lake. Then when widowed, he downsized, bought a smaller place, that kept him busy for a while. Continued to enjoy boating. But once that became too difficult, he had a lot of trouble not knowing what to do with himself! He could have used some of your well-thought-out retirement ideas, Debbie!
ReplyDeleteI hope your knee surgery recovery is going well. Our next door neighbor has had both knees replaced and another friend (60 years old) had both knees and both hips replaced. But, he is back surfing once again. That all amazes me.
ReplyDeleteI retired from teaching in June 2013. Since I always had 8 weeks off in the summer I didn't really feel like I was retired until school started back up in August.
I was always a list maker and I still make lists. I just don't have big deadlines. One way I make sure we do the big things that need to be done around the house is to throw a big party every summer. I have a long list and Steve and I work together to get everything done. We had our 2019 big party 2 weeks ago and we both agreed that we probably won't do another BIG party because we really felt exhausted the day after the party.
Steve retired at 58, but he became a successful oil painter. It was a lot of work to market his art, visit galleries, meet with clients and actually find time to paint. This past year he really cut back on the marketing and gallery displays. He is working on a commission right now and sold a painting the other day.
We decided that it's time to simply play- bike rides, kayaking, daily walks have taken precedence over our lists. We are trying to take 2 big vacations - checking places off our bucket list and also driving once a month to see our 2 little grandsons.
And lately, on these beautiful summer days, we just sit in the garden and read. No one is going to fire us if we don't finish our lists!
Happy Retirement
Starting in our early 50s my husband and I started looking for places we would like to retire. We had a few on the list from travel destinations we enjoyed and returned to frequently. Some were in cities such as downtown San Diego, and some were more rural like Lake Isabella, California. Then one summer we discovered a wonderful spot, Powell River. It was a small town in Coastal BC. As US citizens it presented some problems, but we purchased a cabin floating on Powell Lake and used it as a vacation destination for the next four years. We could stay 6 months each year, which was more than enough while we were working. We both decided to retire early. I was 55 and my husband 58. We wanted to live in our boat access off the grid cabin full time so applied for Canadian permanent residency and were approved in 2008. Now in 2019 we are dual citizens. Life is much different in another country and in a small town after Los Angeles, California. But it has worked well for us. Gardening, cabin upkeep, outdoor activities and a few clubs in town keep us more than busy and engaged. We also travel frequently and just purchased an RV for snowbirding in Arizona, etc. Life couldn't be better. - Margy
ReplyDeleteDebbie, I'm looking forward to learning from you about Time Management. I think the saying about giving a job to a busy person is absolutely right! I haven't worked full-time in a long time, but I found that when my youngest child left for college, I ended up with TOO MUCH free time on my hands! And I've found that I get LESS done around the house now than I did when the kids were small! This is an area I really need to improve in. I'm wasting time, and that's not good! Bless you as you figure out your new rhythm. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for linking up at the #GatheringofFriendsLinkParty 5
ReplyDeleteI think that if you identified with your job as being who you are and not what you do, then it must be hard to adjust when that is no longer a part of you. I guess that's why your husband had to go back to work. I don't thing that is the case for you so maybe when you are feeling better and able to do more, you will feel happier about being retired. Me and my husband retired at 59 and have never looked back. We are very busy in our community (sometimes too busy) and are either taking a vacation or planning a vacation the rest of the time. And in between, we enjoy time with our growing family and good friends. I don't think a day goes by when one of us doesn't say out loud "Life is good!"
ReplyDeleteHi Debbie, I thought I had commented a few days ago but must have only thought I did. A very thoughtful post! We have both been retired since 2003, me due to my chronic Espstein Barr Virus and Chronic Fatigue, later Fibromyalgia. Him at age 58 after working 33 for Pacific Bell. In retrospect I wish we had worked about 5 years more. But it's all good now. He always said he would want to work Part time like at Home Depot or such, but once he retired he decided no work was the best work. Now he has Parkinson's and early dementia at age 74. I'm glad we did the traveling and activities that early retirement allowed us to do. We still do some traveling, but I know the day will come that we can't., so glad we have seen what we have seen of the world!
ReplyDeleteYou're going to do great!
Barb
Great post. I was widowed at a young age. We really didn't have much time to build a retirement. I was a stay at home Mom. It was a huge adjustment for me to work outside my home. I was dealing with the grief of losing my husband, 4 children were depending on me. It was hard. But through the tender mercy of the Lord I did what needed to be done. Yes, I am still working at age 71. I am by nature a homebody. I love being a Mom, grandma, homemaker. I have many interests and hobbies. I work part-time, it is hard on me, but I am thankful the Lord has helped me provide for myself and still do the things I love. I believe life is how you make it to be. It is what you make it to be. Working years to retirement years, be thankful you could work, many people can not, and be thankful for retirement, some people never reach retirement. Thank goodness for part-time jobs, for volunteers, for caring, kind people who after years of working can now use their time and their skills and talents to bless other people. Thanks Deb, you are amazing and will continue to be amazing no matter where you are or what you are doing.
ReplyDeleteVery thoughtful post! And now that it is truly official -- best wishes on your retirement!!
ReplyDeleteI'm also a retired RN, Debbie. My hospital closed in Brooklyn, NY, where I had worked in the Surgical ICU for many years. Afterward, I worked part time as an agency nurse and school nurse for awhile and then retired in my 60's. It was time--I was tired and I was helping to take care of my elderly Mother at the time. I was never bored. I began my blog, explored and blogged about NYC, and did volunteer work and lots of reading. I had fun with friends and family. My husband and I moved to Colorado as our children and grandchildren were here and we joined community clubs to amke friends and do volunteer work with a history group, and doing things with our grandchildren keeps us busy. I love being retired!
ReplyDeleteWe are retiring in 18 months and so excited to see how we manage all our free time. We travel with hubby's work now, living in our RV so we get to see a lot of places. Hoping he doesnt get too bored from retirement! I'll have to keep him busy! Found you at the saturday-sparks-link-party-338
ReplyDeleteHi Debbie,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that your knee threw a wrench into your plans...but I'm glad you were able to take medical leave. I hope you are doing well and enjoying your early retirement!
My husband retired very early...at 55! But I always knew that he would never fully retire. He started a business and works as a contract writer and he really enjoys it. :)
I left my job when our son was having a lot of trouble in school and started homeschooling...something I never intended to do. It was a ready made 'job' and took up much of my time until he graduated and started college. That was when I started to blog. :) I keep very busy with gardening, raising chickens, and writing.
Thank you for sharing on Farm Fresh Tuesdays!